new beginnings

Autumn is not a time for change. It symbolizes nothing. It is simply the time of year in which new leaves come and we are reminded again of our short time here. We remind ourselves that change is inevitable and that we cannot always be happy. We do this because it is one of the many mechanisms we use to mask the confusion we feel inside no matter how well we put ourselves together. This is uniquely human and people, after they are gone, know of the mistakes they made and do so wish they had another chance to make things a little better. People are afraid to be happy because they somehow believe they need to be something other than what they are. They somehow believe they have been chosen for bigger things, more responsible things with bigger scope, etc. One way to use that is to say to yourself that you are tired, you are this, you are that and soon you are 56 years old and saying something entirely different; by that time you will have become hard as a rock, stale, and bitterly unhappy. Autumn is not a time for change. It is a reminder of what used to be and never can be again. 98