A true victory is walking through the darkness and somehow making it through to the other side. Some see victory as being a military or sports reference to the winners. This is indeed the case. However, until someone has spent time walking with what can only be called demons (occurs inside your mind), they don't have very much to say about it. I do not recommend anybody walk down the path of addiction, to anything. For me, alcohol was the gateway to my own personal hell. I do not have any regrets for having gone through each of my nine or 13 withdrawal episodes of which two led to seizures and one led to me stopping breathing. I have too many family members and friends who have struggled and lost to alcohol and/or drugs. I was ready myself to cross that line. During the later portion of my struggle, I could not sleep and the only thing I did was drink beer. My hair started falling out. I shook all the time. There was never enough. I have to say that during my years of drinking, I met a lot of strange people. It is really amazing how there is an entire sub-culture devoted to drinking. To be a part of that traveling carnival is something you just have to experience to believe. The main issue always becomes, "what do I do now?" After you have done the party thing, the sex thing, the winding up in another state thing, you will come to the crossroads: continue and die or stop and live. As far as I know, there is nothing worse than the three to four day withdrawals. The things I saw were truly horrifying. In every instance, I quit cold turkey. This is a huge mistake. But at the same time there was no way in hell I would ever be able to ween myself off of alcohol. It was cold turkey or nothing. I still have my life-long companion, manic depression... whatever that means. Alcohol took it away for a short time. But once that time became too much to bear, I had to accept the pain I have always felt on the inside. I cannot run from my darkness, but I know I cannot drown it away either.

I see nothing wrong with being alone. Society seems to frown on single people as if we were suspects in a crime. Questions appear in their minds: he must be gay, he must have lost his wife, he definitely has mental problems, he must be afraid to commit, and so on. These are typical reactions from a pool of people which consist of those who have a 50% chance of making their marriage work. Making something work between two people takes compromise. It takes the kinds of compromises a single person need not think about. Is it true that some single men and women are afraid to commit? The answer is yes. But this cannot rationally be applied to all single people. I think we are too easy to classify someone that is different than what society and families expect.
Being human means we are all different, yet we all have many things in common regardless of pigmentation, history, religion, family, friends, hopes, and social belief systems. We all have dreams to be engaged in that which truly brings us joy, to raise a family, to travel, to take chances, to experience victory and find understanding in defeat. Those who are single and experiencing the middle part of their lives are considered, to a certain and measurable extent, outsiders. It is as if they are sitting alongside a great river while everyone else is swimming in it and having a good time. That example may not happen where anybody can see it, but it does happen in the minds of misfits like me. I have come to know that goodness does not always win the game. Reality brings it all to you in full force. Finding a niche in such and accelerating society is almost impossible. But I know it begins with one single thought. That thought must be different because you are you and there is nobody else like you.

Steve Miller Band - Serenade (from the Stars)

In a society built on a foundation of lies, truth is often hard to find. At certain times in various forms of media, words get spoken and written by certain people with dark affiliations. These words are designed to expel disinformation upon this society as a whole. The dog and pony shows on our televisions (our gods) only serve to keep us uninterested in the realities nobody cares to see or investigate.
 People often make the mistake that media was once honest and free from politics and/or influences designed to sway public opinion. That lies have never been used. That sources have been made up and so on and so forth. Nothing could be further from the truth. The people must not know what is happening to them as they wouldn't believe it anyway. Only from the outside can one gain a fuller understanding of society and what makes it live and breathe.
The spells run so deep covering multiple generations that hard evidence presented to any one person that runs contrary to what they believe serves no real purpose as they would call it all lies. The spell is working well and will continue to do so. Truth is very often a most destructive force. It serves no purpose unless people are getting paid in some way. The internet is but one more avenue being used to spread disinformation. Not until I finished school later in life did I realize that the books we were reading in school were also littered with misinformation and half truths. Nothing is as it seems, nothing!

If you have an earthly dream, you have to know whether or not it is doable. If you have determined that it is doable, you must then plot the steps necessary to achieve that goal. This takes research and study. It takes putting yourself in the right place at the right time. For most of us, the pursuit of dreams is not possible. Many of us gave up on our dreams to pursue a career and family. If the chosen career is the dream, then success has been achieved and that person can go to their grave happy. However, this is not the reality most of us know. In fact, society and friends, even family, will try to discourage the one who pursues his dream. They will stand alongside the road when he comes running by and they will throw fruit at him from both sides. They will criticize, laugh, and mock the dreamer. Well, I believe in the dreamer. I believe in the underdog. If someone has the balls to really go out there and make it happen, then I will encourage them the entire way through. I am reminded by Carl Sagan's pale blue dot. Anybody who watches that short clip will have a better understanding of where we truly are in the cosmos and how insignificant and temporary we all are. It is from that perspective one should begin their journey. Having a dream is wonderful. Just make sure it can be done and then roll the dice and make it happen.

I fail to see how ignorance is something to be cherished. I also fail to see how science interrupts the religious flow in this country. Both ignorance and religion are the results of two things: media and control. They run hand in hand here. The many people who are under this media spell are unaware of its influence both in the way they think and the way they perceive the world. Religion is now and has always been about control. Don't get me wrong, I think it is a good thing to believe in a higher source no matter what anybody calls it. However, like all things human, religion can be taken too far. It matters not which religion it is or what part of the world from which it comes.

I have been investigating the effects of media, specifically television, on the people of this country. It is an ongoing investigation that has revealed nothing new from where I stand. While the methods of this kind of witchcraft have become increasingly influential, the many among us have fallen victim to  spells that have been cast upon them without their knowledge. The years and years of media influence through television has, in many ways, shaped all our lives right from the beginning. We have been told what to think the whole time. We have, in large numbers, relinquished the ability to think independently. This is the definition of ignorance.

Humanity is easily influenced. And when you live in a media circus like we do, you get to see first hand what happens to people who are walking, talking, repeaters of information they heard on television. When you call them on it, they deny it immediately or withdraw from the conversation completely. They have chosen to believe what television has always been telling them, especially their favorite news channel. This, of course, bypasses any knowledge about why news channels are in business. They are in business to make their shareholders money. This is their first priority. They have never had to be truthful.

In this country, nothing has more influence on the population than media and religion. One could say that media brings ignorance just as religion brings ignorance. In my mind, there are too many sets and sub-sets of religion in this country and they all think they're right. That scares me to a certain extent. One major issue I have with religious people is their tendency to quote the Bible a lot using only those passages that suit their beliefs and justifications for those beliefs. To me, that is not the purpose of the Bible. Television is the most powerful influence on the people of this country and it keeps the masses ignorant as to what is really going on in the world. Believing in a higher power is something that is personal and there is nothing wrong with that at all. Religion should not, however, close one off to the needs of his fellow man.

I see promise in the eyes of certain people both young and old. I believe there is a fire that has never really been put out by the realities of life that are being sold to them. I believe they can see through the pack mentality and are not afraid to pursue their own personal goals - however large or small they may be. In this world today, very few people can say they are doing what needs to be done, step by step, so their personal dream can be realized in this earthly life. It could be the dream of a man to beat his addiction to alcohol and put the bottle down for good. Anyone who has been to hell knows what I am talking about. It could be the dream of a woman to be a poet and a painter. In this world today, it would be a difficult task to find monetary success in such a capacity, but the inner peace that comes with the pursuit is what serves as the driver, I would think, for such a woman. I believe inner peace is something we should find before we become the ground we walk on. I can only hope that inner peace can be found through technology in some way. If this is not the case, then humanity is in serious trouble.