15 second floating

I must have been dreaming. I was floating above the ground and spinning ever so slowly. It felt like I was about 5 feet up and I could see the carpet on the floor. But the floor was green grass with little chipmunks on it playing badmitten with grapes instead of birdie's. Well, I was a bit taken back from this dream. I wondered if it had anything to do with my childhood. Then I realized that it couldn't have been my childhood that was responsible for the whole 15 second experience. It had to be the fact that, at that point, I had not slept in a few days; and I don't do drugs, drink, or anything of the like; except the occasional 3 week Vegas bender. If you really want to know what it feels like to rip one off, spend three full weeks in Vegas with nothing but clubs, booze, sex and everything else you can imagine. Do that once and every now and again you too can have the 15 second floating experience.

no much

What do we do with those who have no conscience, are aware of it, and still refuse to be cool? I would think being aware that one has no feelings for anything would be somewhat of a crisis. It must be a bad place to occupy. It must be an empty place where even the funnest of fun cannot be enjoyed. For some of these people, the only joy is when they see someone having issues with their life and being glad they don't feel that much. LLC

asleep

There is a trend happening now and we are all a part of it. We are tadpoles in a sea of swirling media. Infusion has taken place and we now have a social system that relies on inconspicuousness and anonymity. Our human bonds are being broken and we rely far too much on medication. Next time you watch your favorite program, time it. Notice each commercial and what is being sold in each commercial; time them. See how they relate to the target audience. Keep an eye on the prices of each item being sold. Imagine the cost of each commercial. Check the stock reports to see how well those advertisers are doing at selling the products they were hired to sell. Look for fluctuations in market and media related outlets. Watch the news; see who sells what at what time. Pay attention to as many details as you can. Remember, all the things in the market, and at the market, are made from the same machines with the same materials. All the meds; in my cabinet! lol, just kidding. I keep them at my friends house. Seriously, if you want the profit stock, pharmaceutical medication. See who make them. Check their stocks for fluctuations; quarterly reports; tax exemptions, and so on and so on. We take the drugs because there is oney in it. We take the drugs because we see pretty butterfly's flying slowly around a wheat field as a beautiful woman runs across it with a good ole American sundress on and her hands in the air; smiling largely. Who wouldn't want that feeling? I really believe we are all sleeping too much. Someone needs to wake us all up. LLC

breed of us

The angels are many and they look just like you and me. The demons are all over and they look just like you and me. This is not the movies or anything of the kind. It does not symbolize anything other than reality. There is another breed of us that has all the same qualities as the above mentioned with just one exception; and these people have it worse of than anyone; they are caught between these two entities while being influenced from every angle to do this or that. There is no clear connection with anything. Inside their chest beats a heart filled with fear and anxiety that is masked in work, in play, in school, or in the everyday activities of a fast moving life. If they stop for even a second, the voices come from within and make every minute of every day a living hell from the inside out. Look around and see the world around you. See how everything is disconnected and secretive. Watch them walk, listen to them talk and not one word has even a reseblance of something new. The angels are easy to find, it's the demons that are more difficult to find because they often live right out in front of you where they are sure not to be seen.

comparisons and flypaper

Redefine nothing. Listen to nobody. If they had the answers, they would be elsewhere. Believe nothing except in your ability to completely become emancipated on the inside through rationalizations and generalizations, comparisons and flypaper. Realize the effects others have upon you and abandon them in that way only. They mean no harm in their words, they just have no other way of communicating to you. They have many rationalizations for themselves as well; so in that regard they are like you and me without the them and us. What is left is up to each of us as individuals without the discontent of others discontentments making an already difficult path even more so. LLC 98.2

alone in no pain

There was a woman once who became an object to me. I could not get her out of my head. I was scared to even talk with her. I felt like a kid. It was as if everything on earth shifted for me and I have not been the same since.
That moment in time when I saw her was the greatest moment ever in my life. If I would have said anything to her then, and on that day, it would have been a catastrophy. I would have misfired my words and she would have been entertained by it. Now that I think about it, I probably should have.
There was another woman once, who shifted my planet. However, she was a tad bit different. She had a temper on her that could power a small town in Ohio. Needless to say, it was all her fault. Ok, one evening I did go to a strip club and she found me in the parking lot having a beer and chilling. She beat me like a butter bean and crushed my balls with her foot. Let me tell you something so I can be clear here as to the extent of the damage. First, it took MINUTES for me to find a breath. I was a dead man and I knew it. Hell, even if I did survive, the consequences were sure to be the equevalent to an uphill climb mid-summer with a putrid hangover; for weeks. I could not understand how something could feel so completely and utterly uncomfortable and just all around bad. I wanted to curl up into a little ball and cry aloud, "Mommie!," and then just die alone in the bush.
There was another woman who changed things for the worse. She decided to have her brother come over and kick my ass. It was all her fault. She cheated on me; I have never done that to a woman yet they always seem to find time for themselves in that way. Anyway, she turned out to be a multiple personality. Not split personality, but multiple. Turns out I went out with Jennifer who loved pills and booze.
Another woman made life interesting. She wanted to paint my dog pink. She was in school at the time and for fun she enjoyed going to Hollywood to hang out in an abandoned house with a band. One evening we were at a club and she saw someone she knew. The guy she knew just got out of prison and she could not wait to go and be with him. I thought she was kind of rude seeing as how we were out together. But hey, thesethings happen.
My point is that relationships are a touchy thing at best. Sometimes it is best to be alone. I know it sure is a Hell of a lot more quiet and less painful.

microblasty

Enclosed within there is a muddled view of the world. Someone said once,"You can dream all day and be happy, but who the Hell is going to paint the car!" I pondered that for a moment and then it hit me; that dude was 3 cheeses short on his enchilada. Needless to say, I did gather some useful information as a result of that encounter. I did come to a reasonable conclusion as to the origins of the universe.
Man in the world today cannot know. We can try; and that's a misnomer because we implies me and them when I have never met them; or you for that matter. Suffice it to say that I do not own a car which solves the first issue. As far as the origins of the universe, I have concluded that it is really, really big. How it came to be is to be completely free from all rationality in even considering it in the first place. Big Bang this and Adam and Eve that; if you think you know something well enough to preach it, you should not be a preacher. This holds true for many things as real teachers always learn from their charges. If they do not, then they are poor teachers and should consider another line of work. I would suggest label painting or shoe-lace polishing.
I used to work with a dude who was in his late 50's; a young man. He carried a Phd and was a teacher. He now worked as a casino cleaning guy. He told me once, only once, that the job he has now makes him feel good. When I asked why he replied,"I have freedom in this place. I can move and breathe here. I can do the job then go straight home. I can stay up late, gamble, drink, eat well, have insurance, an apartment with low rent and utilities, a stripper as a neighbor, and poker games with friends 3 days a week." I thought about that for a minute.
This man Dave was an intriguing character. He had it all: the cash, the standing, the respect. He dropped it all because he was not doing what he wanted to do and there was far too much pressure and it was affecting his health. So he quit and moved to Nevada where he has the kind of job that suits him best. He has no prick boss lurking at his backside; no immediate cares in the universe; no desire for anything else, and a complete outlook that has at its foundation an idea. This idea is what spurred me into my conclusion about the universe.
The universe originated a long time ago. The Earth is not even relevant in comparison. To compare Earth to the rest of the universe is like comparing a fly print to the rest of the universe. The fact is, we are all completely clueless to the big questions; by design. This is why Dave's story is the key to the whole damn thing. All Dave wanted was a less stressed sort of life with an emphasis on happiness. He wanted to look forward to his days while he had them. He grew tired of the mud slinging that was clouding his perspective, his desire and his views of the world. The origin of the universe is hope and happiness. So there, nothing can come from badness. Badness is a human creation only. It is a function of human beings to change just like the weather.