The worst and longest kind of alone is recognizing the fact that you are with someone that you no longer have feelings for. This "process" can be draining on the self which takes from the soul. Making the transition from being alone to being "alone' is a difficult one. But the rewards make up for the initial change and heartache.

Back around

I keep thinking about my first girlfriend, the one who taught me how to kiss properly. She is on my facebook page and is in a happy relationship. I am happy for her. She was a nice person back in junior high and I have no doubt that she carries those same good qualities with her today wherever she goes. Funny how life brings people back around.

There is absolutely no reason to deny yourself the things that you desire. Follow a step by step plan to achieve your goals. But the most important thing to remember is that it all takes time. There is no rush. Enjoy the ride along the way. Make new friends. Go out and see the world around you. Make the entire process enjoyable for yourself and those nearest to you.

There are many types of friends. There are fair-weather friends who only seem to call when things are going right for you. There are friends who only call when they need something. And there are true friends who never want a thing from you. Sure there are more kinds of friends, but these three are what we humans come across most in our lives. It's a juggling act to keep our lives together because sometimes we don't really know who are true friends really are.

Every television show, well, most television shows, begin each episode with a murder. This leads to a desensitization of the murder process... if you can call it that. There is a murder, a process by which the murder is solved, and then resolution of the case. There is blood, there is destruction, and families are broken apart. Why does murder sell? What sells the programs that sell murder? Pharmaceutical medication.

I know

There comes a point in all our lives where we must admit to ourselves that we don't really know anything. In order to know something, we must first be able to prove it. Oh sure we all know a few things here and there. But for the most part, when looking at the bigger picture, it is very true that we don't really know all that much; especially when one takes into account all the video games, movies, and television shows we watch. Nothing could be a bigger waste of time or more of a distraction.

The older I get the more I appreciate sleep. When I was a young man, I could go days without sleep. I just left myself in party-mode all the time. When I crashed out I crashed out for an entire 24 hour period. Then, once I recovered, which was a very short time, I began the process all over again with the same group of guys. I wasted a lot of time in those days and took chances I shouldn't have taken. But through it all I am glad I lived on the edge the way I did. I took no pictures. I lived it man.

If everyday seems like the same as the one before, it probably is. That said, there needs to be variety in all our lives. We must make it, from time to time, out of our comfort zone. This is where we get to experience new things, new ideas, and new perspectives. It is from such places that the drag of everyday life does not bring us down. In fact, there is no drag in a life that only feels comfortable when doing new and interesting things.

alone

The loneliest of people are not the ones who are literally alone. The loneliest people are the ones who have to get up in the morning and put themselves together for something they cannot stand; another day of doing the same things over and over again with the same people over and over again. We all need to break free from the solitude of being an actor and celebrate who we really are as people.

away

I often feel down or out of sorts in one way or the other. I do not know where it comes from, this darkness. But I do know why it is there: to test me. I have got to believe that or I will lose my mind again. The one thing I never want to do is drink. But lately, drinking seems like it would be a pretty good way to avoid this darkness. The only problem with me and drinking is that we like each other way too much. After some time the darkest of times will return and I will want to die... again.